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    Brain in a Jar – The Verbatim Monologue

    SOON-TO-BE FUTURE OF REMOTE CONTROL TERRORIST IF HE DOESN'T QUIT STARTING EVERY SENTENCE WITH "YOU LIBERALS"

    “I’ve decided the problem with humanity is we surround ourselves with crap,” the Remote Control Terrorist said.  “Everything is crap. That’s why I want to be a brain in a jar. But then I’d decide the jar is crap so I’d have to get rid of the jar.  I’d just be a brain on a shelf. But the shelf is crap as well so I’d get rid of the shelf and become a brain on the floor. But why would I need the floor when I could be tossed outside in the dirt? That’s probably best. I want to be a brain in the dirt.”

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